The Weekend

--Saturday, November 1st, the last of the 5 girls had finally fallen asleep about 1:30 a.m., which was Emma. For a 3 year old she had a lot of energy. Her and her sister Madison was at each other until I found a way to keep them separated. I woke them all up relatively early and got them dressed for the day. We all headed to my house for brunch. The Mom’s had not made it back home yet, and I didn’t feel comfortable cooking in someone else’s kitchen. Later in the day, Karla checked in, made sure the kids were okay. The kids were doing everything; playing on the Wii, “chasing the horses”, and I even hear the song “I kissed a girl”, being sung by Keri, Alysa, Stella and Paige.

Then all of the kids started singing different songs, including Christmas songs. When Karla made it home I brought her the kids and a Subway. The kids and I helped to clean up the mess they had made.

I had invited Paige and Alysa over to spend the night with Stella. Karla didn’t have plans for anything and found herself with no kids. Well I would up with the same girls over at my house till Sunday afternoon. Trust me I wasn’t complaining. I haven’t heard this much laughter in my house in a long time. I grilled up some hamburgers and hotdogs for dinner. Took dinner over to Karla and allowed her time to go out again.

All day Sunday was filled with activities and games that kept the girls from getting bored. Stella was really enjoying herself and so was Keri, who surprisingly enough took a day off from her boyfriend to help me out. Keri got the girls into more singing. I think Christmas is going to make an early appearance at my house. She even helped me with cooking lunch?!!

Sunday Dinner was simple because I had agreed to take Stella by the hospital to visit with Linda. For the first time in a week, Stella actually had one on one attention from Linda. Linda had set up some pictures for the two of them to color. Keri had come along for moral support, but after getting snubbed by Linda she waited outside the ward reading a book. Linda was trying her best to get information out of Stella about what out activities were and Stella would just answer “I’ve just been doing kid things”. I don’t know why Stella was omitting so much from Linda. She only said that she had gotten a lot of candy for Halloween and was “having fun with Paige and Alysa. And two girls you haven’t met before Mom, Madison and Emma.” I kept getting strange looks from Linda and a sense that she did not like the idea of Stella withholding information. After the visit I asked Stella why and she only said that “I was afraid that Mom would get angry at you again Dad.” Here I was thinking that I was protecting her from dealing with the stress. Who would have thought that an 8 year old could be trying to protect me? So much for keeping her out of it! It was time for us to go home, unwind and get ready for another school week.

-Ken

Happy Halloween

--This was the most complicated day of the whole week, but in a good way. It started with getting the girls dressed in their costumes, for school. I couldn’t get a picture of Keri, because she was shy about being caught in a dress of any sort. Especially this outfit, it showed too much of her legs. The younger ones were all excited by the time we hit the bus stop. They all loaded into my van to stay warm. Bryce (Daughter of my Battalion Chaplain) joined us.

Karla joined me for the Primary School’s parade and Halloween Party. I was fun to get down with these kids. They had a lot more energy then us parants.

After the party we had to rush off to pick-up Alysa from her school, run to McDonald's for a quick dinner and get home. We were expecting more kids over and wanted to be ready for Trick or Treat. Keri desided to spend the evening with her boyfriend. Stella was a Fairy. Alysa was a Black Cat. Paige was a Cute Bunny. Madison was a Little Devil. And Emma was a Little Fairy.

After all of this and all of the sugar, my evening wasn't done. Karla, Alison, and Liz were planning a Lady's Night Out. So it was just the 5 girls for the night with me babysitting.

-Ken

Fun @ Stella's Art Class

Proud and Happy! One of the Paiges


The other Paige. Paige helping to direct.


Stella's really going at it. Paige and Stella.


I wasn't the only Parent. Liz and Paige.

--Thursday, October 30th, the day was spent shopping and relaxing. We had to get everything ready for Halloween. These pictures were taken on the 24th of October. I wasn't able to get them downloaded from the camera until now.

-Ken

Continuing on:

--Wednesday, October 29th, I arrived at the Court House early. (I was able to get Karla to see Stella off to school.) This allowed me to get my paperwork in order and mentally prepare for the task of showing evidence of Linda’s disorder as an endangerment to the well being of our two children. I needed to present my case to protect the children and leave enough room in the orders for me to take care of Linda’s interests. The Judge was very good at understanding what I was trying to get accomplished. He asked me several questions, all of them involving Linda’s actions and the impact to children. It’s was difficult to not feel like I was betraying her. I stuck to the task at hand. The Judge awarded me with the Protection Order for Keri, Stella, our home residence and my place of employment. I was also awarded with temporary custody of Stella. While the Protection Order does prevent Linda with making contact with the children, the Judge ensured that while this Protection Order was in place that Linda would still be able to make contact with me for supervised visitation with Stella.

While the Orders were being type up by the Court Clerk, Danielle and I discussed what would be required next. I was responsible for serving the Orders on Linda, but couldn’t do so until Linda was out of the hospital. She set me up on the correct path and insured that I would call her prior to the next Court appearance on the 21st of November.

I left for Thompson Park to take a break and to take pictures of the snow fall. This allowed me to relax and straiten out my emotions. I can’t begin to describe the emotions that have been going through me. Anger: at myself, for allowing everything to come to this. Regret: for Stella and Linda both. Sadness: after finding myself alone again. Hesitation: wondering if I was doing the right thing. And so much more was running through my head.

I returned to Fort Drum, briefed the chain of command, notified the MP station and called Linda’s Social Worker with the information. Deb and I discussed the impact that this would have on Linda’s emotional state and how best to proceed. She needed a copy to ensure that I was legally able to appear at the Mental Health Department. So I made another trip to Watertown to deliver the copy and to drop off a few things for Linda. With most of my tasks accomplished, I returned back to the house. It didn’t feel much like a home anymore. I did some more work on the house and chatted with a few friends, then returned to Karla’s to meet Stella, Alysa, and Paige at the bus stop. Karla has been extremely helpful in ensuring Stella has plenty of distractions and friends to keep her busy throughout all of this.

The snow has been falling steadily and has given us more then a foot to play with. So of course I did just that. Not the way I wanted to, (sledding at Thompson Park), but I still had a lot of fun with Keri, Stella, Alysa, and Paige. The snow has always made me feel like a kid again.

-Ken

Playing Catch-up

--On Tuesday, October 28th, I had an appointment with Victim Assistance to start the protection order. I sat in their office going over all the things that had happened. They provided a great deal of assistance in preparing my Petition for Protection Order and the Petition for Temporary Custody of Stella. After they had all of the information needed they told me to return later for the review of the documents. I used the time to clear my head and make a few phone calls. I made a trip to the hospital to check on Linda’s health. I found her still in the emergency room. This in itself was a little strange, because the previous two times she was taken up on the same day.

The visit was a very tense of course, but that’s was expected. I saw the damage she’d done to her wrist and decided to wait a few days before Stella came to visit. This was not something for her to see.

I returned to the Court House to check on the status of the petitions and after reviewing them, Danielle stayed with me until they I filed them with Family Court. They had the Request for an Emergency in with the paperwork; so I was able to get a hearing the following morning at 8:30. I thanked Danielle for her assistance and mad arrangements to meet before the hearing. The evening was spent with Karla’s family and preparing for my meeting with the Judge. Our first snow of the season was coming down outside and I was doing my best to enjoy. I felt like a kid again

-Ken